Late update on UK trip – special edition for the Facebook generation

WARNING: Some older readers may find this section disturbing, other older readers may find it reminds them of their youth.

Well after protracted discussions with corporate, copyright and patent lawyers we can finally post an extra update on some of our adventures in the UK. Details still remain somewhat confidential due to Facebook contracts and the pending release of a new reality show to rival The Only Way is Essex. The working title for the new show is The Other Way is Liverpool and the setting is the halls, student accommodation and haunts of Liverpool Uni students. It was going to be called Elke's Excellent Adventure but apparently Keanu Reeves objected.

Editors note: movie reference – Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure 1989; a cult classic starring Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter

Anyway, on our trip Di and I were fortunate enough to meet some of the potential cast members.

In order of appearance:

Simon, who (with a team of others) assists Elke in some of the more difficult challenges she has faced in Liverpool like feeding herself and getting home.

At a special dinner in our honour, at one of Liverpool's more salubrious eating establishments – The Gourmet Burger Bar (student discount Monday – Thursday) we then met:

• Simon (again), Chris and Haydn – a likely (and lively) bunch of lads who share the Hall with Elke. With a diverse range of studies including law, flying and colouring in.
• Bronagh, Rosie, Lou, Kate, Danielle - not sure of the details with the girls, because all conversation took place at “the girls table” and secret women's business rules apply. I can reveal:
• • Rosie may be visiting Australia for Christmas (I mention this Vicki because you may need to set an extra place for lunch).
  • Any of our younger male readers who are interested in spending more quality time with Kate would be wise to invest in a decent pair of Chinos and a well made pair of shoes
  • As a veterinary student Lou doesn't get as many holidays as the others. Unless you consider a couple of weeks helping sheep give birth as a holiday. (Not many people outside of New Zealand and Wales do).
  • As another hockey player much of what Danielle talked to Di about has not been passed on to me (thanks everyone for that, remember Rule 4: Dad doesn't need to know)

On our travels out of Liverpool we then met:

• Bronagh (again), who we eventually met in Belfast. We would have met her, and her lovely Mum Tara, earlier if a) the Sat Nav had been working and b) we could have given them a better idea of where we were in Belfast than “outside a dodgy looking pub and near a multi storey car park”

• Ollie – bon vivant, sailor and man about town. Ollie drove cross country from his home near Chichester to Brighton to meet us for lunch. Not quite a Ewan McGregor, Charlie Boorman Long Way Round but a good effort nonetheless and much appreciated by us.

• Xtina, that's the Aguilerra spelling, in Eastbourne it's spelt Christina. We met Christina and her, also lovely, mum and sister in Eastbourne for dinner. Christina is currently a little out of action due to a skiing accident. Eastbourne newspaper reports local club takings are down.

To complete the tour it was back to Liverpool and:

• Bronagh (again) – I think if we had stayed an extra week we may have had to talk to Bronagh about stalking.

• Chris, Simon, Haydn and Lou for a tearful farewell

Special mention must be made of potential cast member Dee, who we didn't manage to catch up with because of her studies. Apparently the Mothercare catalogue is huge this year. Good luck Dee, we're all thinking of you.

Thanks to everyone and apologies to anyone I missed. 

Older readers may want to keep an eye out for the TV show when it airs - and make sure they don't watch it! It will probably carry a PG31 rating (Parents and people over 31 should not view this material).